My Trip to Texas - Day 4

It’s bedtime here now and it was a seemingly quiet day around here. +++++++++++++ I got up around 8:30 am this morning and folded some laundry. Mary Ann woke up soon after I had finished and we changed Dad. This was an exceptionally difficult change as we had to change all the sheets. We attempted to do this with him in bed, but we then decided that it would be easier to move him to a chair. In the process of changing him, I didn’t maintain my attention on Dad and he swiped at Mary Ann’s face and gave her a good scratch. Even though Dad is not all there, he felt bad about hurting her, saying “pobrecita” and crying for a bit. ++++++++++++++ I spent the rest of the morning up until 12:45 picking up the rest of the tree limbs that I had cut the day before. In the process of carrying a rather cumbersome and exceptionally scratchy limb, I got some battle “wounds.” This particular limb, which I was carrying on my right shoulder, began to fall and instead of letting it fall, I tried to keep it balanced. In the process, I not only dropped the limb off my shoulder, but it took some flesh from my neck. It didn’t look too bad, but the salty sweat running into it provided a nice burn for a few minutes. ++++++++++++++ During and just after lunch, Mary Ann and I had an emotional visit. We revisited our last days and hours with my brother Jimmy -- laughing and crying, but mostly crying. We were both feeling melancholic, but it was a healthy 1 hour visit. ++++++++++++++ After our long “lonche,” Mary Ann and I changed Dad. And after changing Dad, I retrieved the tractor with the front-end loader and brought it around the side of the house. Tomorrow, I am going to move a pile of broken bricks that had been dumped under some trees and to create some “burms” in a water way that cuts through one of the cotton fields. When it rains, it makes the small ditch deeper and steeper, so I’m going to drop them in to flatten out the water’s pathway. ++++++++++++++ Moving the tractor only took about 5 minutes. Mary Ann mowed the lawn and I went around taking cuttings from some of the roses around the house to take to the cemetery. I then took one of David’s work trucks to the cemetery to leave the flowers there. It was hot and windy, which is the norm around here. I didn’t get to visit much at Jimmy’s and Mom’s gravesides as I spent the majority of the time watering a few newly planted trees (Mike planted them last week) and some of the other ones that I could reach. I had to return home so that Mary Ann could go to a church council meeting at 6:00. ++++++++++++++ By the time I got home at 5:00, Mary Ann was making squash with corn. I was put in charge of making refried beans, which I did. Mary Ann left around 5:45 and I was home alone with Dad for about 40 minutes, during which time I sat and visited with him as we watched “El Capo,” which is a pretty intense/dramatic show (on one of the Spanish channels). David arrived around 6:30 and we change Dad again. He was cooperative; perhaps he was feeling bad about hurting Mary Ann earlier. We made short work, and David hurried off for a school board meeting; apparently, they were hiring a new superintendent. I stayed home alone with Dad for another 45 minutes and Pat and her family (Madeline, Felicia, and Brandon) arrived for a quick visit. I fed Dad during this time and visited with Pat briefly. They left at 7:30 for Alco’s; their new kitten needed some flea medication and the store closed at 8:00. I went inside and washed dishes. ++++++++++++++ I ended my evening with Mary Ann falling asleep in the bed in Dad’s room while Charlie and I watched the Phoenix Suns defeat the Los Angeles Lakers. By the end of the game, it was 10:35 and it was time for Dad to have his last change of the day. Charlie and I changed him, and just as were finishing, Mary Ann woke up and went to bed. ++++++++++++++ So, now it’s just before midnight and Dad is dozing off. So am I. ++++++++++++++ Breakfast: Oatmeal Lunch: Baked Potatoes, chips Dinner: Refried beans and squash w/corn & cheese

My Trip to Texas - Day 3

Before I begin, I noticed that the formatting (line spacing mostly) is not showing up properly after I export to my iPhone and upload from there. Sorry. ++++++++++++++++++++ I had a better night’s sleep last night. Dad was not as restless, or I was just sleeping more soundly. Either way, I feel more rested today. My sister Mary Ann came into the room that I am sharing with Dad around 8:30 am, and we changed him. Dad was especially feisty this morning. It’s usual that he will try to bite, punch, scratch, curse, yell, or cry when he is changed. On the other days, while he is combative, he is not as strong; today, he was pushing us around and I had to use all my strength to keep him from hurting himself or us while Mary Ann changed him. After being changed, he felt better. The kids called from Kentucky to say hello and we visited for about twenty minutes until Mary Ann, who had made some oatmeal with raisins and prunes for Dad, came into the room. I hung up with the kids and fed Dad, which took about 15 minutes. He took a nap while I ate my serving of oatmeal. The nurses arrived around 10:20 and gave Dad a shower. While they were showering Dad, I worked on a report for my department head (Unit Productivity Report for those who know what it is). After this, I spent the remainder of the day trimming large, low-hanging tree branches around the house. All in all, I think I trimmed 6 trees and cut another 20 foot tree down to its trunk. Mary Ann and I hauled most of the large branches away and made / added to another large pile of branches. The cutting and hauling took about 5 hours of work; it was nice exercise and I can tell that I will be sore in the morning. There were other smaller events throughout the day, but honestly, I’m so physically tired right now that I’m doing all I can to keep from falling asleep in the recliner. Briefly: Dad had 4 changes today; Ricky stopped by around dinnertime to help with Dad; I visited with my kids and wife briefly twice (once this morning and again around 8:30 pm). Breakfast today: oatmeal with sugar and cinnamon Lunch today: mixed salad topped with chicken and walnuts Dinner/Supper: refried beans, rice, tamales, and fresh flour tortillas

My Trip to Texas - Day 2

It’s just before midnight on Sunday, May 23, and it’s been a good two days since I arrived on the farm. Please excuse my brevity as I skim the past day and a half. My brother Mike picked me up at the airport, and on the way home, we stopped at Dairy Queen in Weatherford, Texas, where he treated me to a Hunger Buster meal -- basic hamburger, fries, and a coke. After having this nostalgic meal, we continued our drive home, sharing sunflower seeds and good conversation about life, death, and a bit of politics (but just a bit and it was quite civil). After arriving home around 4:00, we visited with my brother Charlie (another brother). After saying hi to Dad and visiting for about an hour, we left for church in Colorado City, Texas. Mass lasted just over an hour after which we enjoyed a nice meal at Hidalgo’s Mexican restaurant with a perfect stranger. A man who had shown up in town/church stayed afterward and was asking for some money for food; apparently, he was making his way from somewhere in Colorado to San Angelo, Texas. My brother picked up the bill (again) for us; he is so kind-hearted and I never knew how much until this weekend. in addition to sharing this tasty meal (I had chile relleno), I ran into my 4th grade teacher Janet Moore and her husband Stan. She looked wonderful and it was nice to -- while only briefly -- to say hello and snap a picture of them together. My sister Mary Ann, who had spent the previous day in San Angelo for a Relay for Life event, picked me up at the restaurant on her way back to Loraine. After arriving home and unpacking the truck (Mary Ann had made trip to the Home Depot), I went inside and helped her change Dad. It’s hard work and I don’t know how she and my brothers do it each day. I spent the night in the room with him but didn’t get much sleep. He was restless, muttering quite a bit throughout the night, and I was easily awakened by that. I got up at 9:30 or so this morning and my brother Mike, Mary Ann, and I changed Dad again. From what I’ve learned, they change him about 3 to 4 times daily and each time it takes anywhere from 30 to 45 minutes to do so. It’s a labor of love, and as difficult as it is -- on so many levels -- I’m glad that I am able to do my small part this week. We ate a late lunch -- tacos, tamales, rice, and beans. My brothers Anastacio, David, and Ricky joined us. After eating, we customarily sat around the table and visited and debated and visited and laughed. Our conversation moved from less serious issues to a discussion about what to do with the estate in the following years. It’s hard to figure out with so many invested parties. We made good progress and I was able to put down some of the language that will be the framework for how we will proceed in the next several years. After this conversation, which lasted about three hours, I took Charlie back to his house in town. I came home and Mary Ann and I walked around the house to see what work she wanted me to do around the house. Tomorrow, I will be cutting down large branches. For the past two hours or so, I sat with Dad and watched the Suns and Lakers play. After that game was over, I helped Mary Ann change Dad before bed, and I’ve been watching Dallas Cowboys highlights while Dad fades into and out of sleep. I’m tired now; my eyes ache. I’m going to bed.

My Trip to Texas

This is my first entry in a series of entries of my time visiting family in Texas. I don’t know how all of this will upload as I have no internet access here on the farm (about five miles north of Loraine, Texas). I have to download a companion iPhone application (MacJournal iPhone App) and sync it to these entries which I am typing on my MacBook Pro. I hope it works. I’m going to download the application now and see if it uploads. Time will pass and you won’t know it, but I started this entry at 2:41. I’ll drop a few lines and let fill you in on how long it took to figure all of this out. .... after downloading the application, it took me about 5 minutes to sync the information on my computer to my iPhone. It took another minute or so to adjust the settings on my iphone and another minute to upload it (slow iPhone connection on the farm).

An Onion Snack

The other day, a friend of mine tweeted that she had eaten some delicious onion rings. I don’t tweet, mind you, but I am on facebook, which is where I read her post. I replied to her post that a favorite snack of mine growing up was eating raw onions, doused with mustard, and wrapped in a tortilla. In fact, this was a favorite after-school snack of many of my siblings. I remember rushing into the house and rummaging through the fridge looking for something to eat.

I’ve posted here a snapshot of what I just had as an appetizer to my breakfast (sautéed onions and scrambled eggs) -- that very same after-school snack. I know it looks gross; I worked very diligently to make it look that way. It won’t change how much I like it.

What kinds of gross snacks did you or do you still enjoy?

MacJournal Software

So I downloaded a bundle of software from Macheist, who perhaps once per year offers 5-7 bits of software at deep discounts and who in turn donate the money to charity. In this software bundle comes MacJournal. I’m trying to figure out if it will work better than going directly to my blogspot on the net and produce entries through that. It seems too cumbersome to log in each time and manage all those buttons.

And so, I successfully created this blog and uploaded it in about 1 minute. No lie.

I think I’ll use this program from now on.

If you are an Apple user, consider the bundle -- the software is pretty darn good (they provide a preview) and your money is donated to good causes.

Bookends - Sabian

Here is a short entry -- perhaps.

As many of you already know, my wonderful mother passed away a little over a week ago.

In addition to the many postings I got on my facebook wall and all the wonderful cards, I also received a nice house plant from the English Department at WKU (where I currently work).

The gift of a plant was very fitting: my mother absolutely loved to garden and she especially loved her houseplants (some from which I took cuttings and repotted in my home two days ago).


The better part of the story is the label on the delivery instructions. As you can see below, my name is spelled with an "S" instead of with an "F."

While you may not find anything special about that, you will once I share another story.

When I was a very young boy (a long, long, long time ago), my mother wanted to get me a very special birthday gift.  I was about six years old, and I wanted a belt with my name on the back.  Dad had one and some of my brothers and sisters had one as well.  And so, Mom decided to go to Woods Boots and buy me a belt.

My mother was told to return a few days later and they would have the belt ready.

Per his instructions, she returned to Woods Boots to pick up and pay for the belt.  She went to the counter and asked to square up.  The problem was that they didn't have a belt with my name on it.  The only belt that they had was one with the name "Sabian" on it.

My mother looked at the belt, saw that it was the one she had picked out for me, but informed the man behind the counter that they had misspelled the name.  He turned it over and said, "No ma'am.  Here is what I wrote.  It's exactly what you said."

He turned the belt over and there was the handwriting:"S-A-B-I-A-N."

My mother told him that that was not what she had said, and the man behind the counter insisted that, yes, that is what she spelled to him and he verified it with her.

Now, my mother knew that she had spelled my name correctly, but she also knew that her English was not perfect.  (She was very self-conscious about this.)

Keep in mind that we didn't have a lot of money growing up, and this was going to be my only birthday gift that year.

My mother paid for the belt and took it home -- begrudgingly and disappointed (and perhaps embarrassed).

As you might have guessed, I never wore the belt (mostly because my siblings made fun of me), but Mom hung onto it, thinking that some day someone would name a child Sabian and she would gift it to him/her.  That time never came around.

About a year ago, I went home for a visit and Mom gave me a few things that belonged to me when I was young: a teddy bear, some shoes and clothes, and this belt.  (The belt now hangs in my closet with my other belts.)

Way back then when my mom bought that belt, she knew that she had spelled my name correctly, but as I said, she was quite aware that her English pronunciation was not perfect (a point I would argue is relative.... I mean, we did grow up in "y'all" country!).  She made right by paying for it.  But, she always thought, in the back of her mind, that it was her fault -- her accent -- that caused the error.

I sit here thinking that I wish I could share this story with her, about how someone else had misheard my name and spelled it incorrectly and in exactly the same way as it was misspelled about 30 years ago.

Of course, there would not have been a second misspelling had she not passed away, but at the very least, I'm comforted to know that it probably wasn't her fault and now I have a beautiful houseplant as proof to remind me of this.